Plus ça change, the more demand for change

Among the birthday presents that arrived this weekend was a book published just 6 months ago by Scholastic, which holds itself out as an educational publisher. The back cover of The Boys' Book: How To Be the Best at Everything included bullet-point samples of "everything" to be learned within, and ad toward the back for The Girls' Book: How To Be the Best at Everything likewise bullet-pointed its contents.

Guess which book promises to teach readers how to:

► Fight off a crocodile?
► Rip a phonebook in half?
► Escape quicksand?
► Speak in code?

And guess which promises lessons on how to:

► Act like a celebrity?
► Make your own bubble bath?
► Give yourself a perfect manicure?
► Knit with your fingers?

Seems no one's told Scholastic that most 21st C. 'Grrls prefer the occasional lizard or snail or puppy dog tail to a ceaseless diet of saccharine stuff.